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Monday, September 29, 2008

Pondering

The past will shape you to what you are for the present and the future? Hmmm.. Hope so.. Its in one of the lines i read in a book.

The shadow of your past does helps to make you into a better person. Maybe because you tend to avoid those bitter scenarios or situations that you might have gone through before. Here i am, stuck in the shadow of my past. For a moment. i thought that i could be happy and be merry with the person i love most, but little did i know that the nightmares came back. Being ignored, shouted and scolded repeatedly for a mistake that you do not know whether your are right or wrong. Vulgarities hurled at you straight in the face. Scary.. I need some one. Some one who can take me away from all that. I know its all in the past, but no one will under stand the hurt that has brought upon me.

To add to this inner fear i have for relationships and bad treatment, she can't do it. I don't blame her for it. She ain't the type to comfort you and be by your side. But who shall i look for if i needed some one to be there for me?? Hmmm.. Sorry guys, after Hari Raya AidilFitri, i might be shutting this blog down. At least i have this blog to talk to i guess(ALONE). Haha.. Gile rite??? But who cares.. That is what a blog is.

God had put me through so many test. Putting me through hardship. With the past i had, with my family, friends. I am glad this is all over for me. I miss my uncles, cousins and aunties. The month where you get together and be happy with your closest relatives and friends. Without doubt there will be more challenges to come but going through the last two years of my life was really a roller-coaster rite. I finally could breathe clean air. I finally can feel that i am walking the correct path of life. Thanks Allah..

Now back to cleaning up the house. Haha!! Mama really making use of me... Lolz...

Before i forget, friends... Senang2 come my hse k for raye.. The address you can call me for it.. How u can call me??? Tag up la.. Then i give u my hp number and address.. Till then Happy Kemasing!!(Too early to wish hari raya leh!!!)

Fadli aka FiDDLer

Music Took Control at; 2:31 PM



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